Police detectives and crime scene investigators spent hundreds of hours on the case, until one of Martinez’s prison co-workers came forward to say Martinez had been talking at work about faking a crime at her home to persuade her husband to move, Sacramento police Sgt. Andrew Pettit said Friday.
…
Missing from her home were two laptop computers, Martinez’s purse, an Xbox video game console, a camera and numerous credit cards that Martinez said the stranger had stolen.

In reality, the items were all at the home of her friend, Nicole April Snyder, authorities allege. Investigators say Martinez had Snyder punch her in the face with boxing gloves they bought for that purpose.

Sounds like Lucy and Ethel’s scheme to get Ricky to move to a nicer neighborhood backfired on them.

A modern art installation valued at (EURO)800,000 ($1.1 million) was damaged after an overzealous cleaning woman scrubbed away a patina intended to look like a dried rain puddle, a Dortmund official said Friday.

I bet the cleaning woman’s going to be ultra cautious now. Empty coffee cup on a table? It’s probably art. Someone shit diarrhea and missed the toilet? Probably a new acquisition.

On a related note, this is what I imagined when I first heard of a drum machine: not an electronic panel that plays drum sounds, but a machine with drumsticks mounted on it that plays a real drum set.

Experts studying the dogs, who usually choose the quietest carriages at the front and back of the train, say they even work together to make sure they get off at the right stop – after learning to judge the length of time they need to spend on the train.

Scientists believe this phenomenon began after the Soviet Union collapsed in the 1990s, and Russia’s new capitalists moved industrial complexes from the city centre to the suburbs.

The dogs have also learned to stare straight ahead and not make eye contact.

[Edit 6.2.11] The official trailer is up now.

What the hell? I see one of these “cable cars” coming down the street and I’m like, “Alright! I’m gonna ride the cable car!” Then I find out it’s a tour bus and it costs $40. That’s like the public transportation version of being fooled by a transvestite. Up yours, fake cable car.

That’s how I want to be honored when I die. I want to be paraded around town for several hours with a marching band, baton twirlers, trained elephants and clowns riding tiny bicycles. And I want to be propped up in the limo’s sunroof so people can look at me. Also, the limo should be constantly shooting fireworks and playing Kool & the Gang’s Celebration (just to be ironic).